On being & feeling

How can one work towards a complete acceptance of the dichotomies parts of themself? Feelings are so often undermined and easily dismissed. Often we’ve been told not to be weak or too sensitive and to self-censor particularly in this asian culture, but now we can honour and embrace these aspects of ourselves through loving acceptance. It’s okay to be too much and not enough. It’s okay for you to be vulnerable and strong. It’s okay to be light and dark.

We don’t have to feel guilty for having feelings.

Some of us have emotions that we forbid ourselves to feel. Which emotion do you struggle to understand or embrace? Which emotion do you tend to criticise or minimise when someone else expresses it? ⁣Suppressing or denying emotions feeds a spiral of guilt and shame, and we don’t deserve that. We deserve our own compassion, acceptance, and love. All emotions are valid, it’s about knowing how to honour, process and manage them. 

Feelings come and go.

We aren’t our feelings, we merely experience them. Our feelings change like the weather, they come and go, much like clouds and rain. We merely experience different seasons and don’t become the storm- and we learn that stormy seasons will eventually pass. Lately I’m learning to not just focus on feeling good, but to be good at feeling. Sitting with feelings is about observing and witnessing the stormy weather, and to give myself the permission to feel and release those emotions by allowing them to speak to me and show me what I really need.

Feelings are messages from the body.

There are no good or bad emotions, just easier or more challenging ones to navigate. Why are tears or negative emotions seen as a bad thing? Challenging feelings can reveal wise messages from our bodies, and our tears can make us strong because we am brave enough to feel deeply and love strongly. Anger is shows us where we feel powerless, apathy shows us where we’ve overextended and are burnt out. Anxiety may tell us to work on our boundaries. Discomfort may indicate what doesn’t feel right. Jealousy shows us what we aspire to be. Joy tells us what matters to us, and fear shows us where we might need safety.

Sitting with my emotions has taught me to locate them in my body, to ask myself what my emotions are telling me and to give myself what i need in the moment. ⁣⁣When facing difficult emotions, I remind myself to let go, allow it to simply Be and to honour it. In my meditation practice I visualise a scene of surrendering my challenging feelings and burying them into the ground. Here, I am burying passing emotions, allowing the rain to come down and water the seeds that I have planted.